March 5, 2008

Finding the Wedding Clothes

Posted in Attire at 5:03 pm by Jess

I only looked at one bridal magazine before finding my dress. I bought it in the JFK airport while making my connection to O’Hare and read it on that flight. I dog-earred three or four. Of the four, only one really struck my fancy and tore it out so I would remember.
When my mom picked me up at the airport, we started talking wedding stuff so I showed her the four dresses in the magazine. She liked all of them, except the one I had torn out (my favorite). “I hate this one. No way!” she said.

The next morning I woke up with extreme jet lag. (i had flown all the way from switzerland). As I had one month in the USA to search for dresses, it wasnt on my list of things to do that very first day. But it was for my mom. She pulled me out of bed saying she was going to take me to breakfast. Aww, how sweet. Except half way there she blurted out “I just noticed this bridal shop the other day and well its on the way so lets just stop.” What a trick she pulled!
After six hours of sleep and jet lag I really wasn’t that keen on it. Plus, the tiny shop had broken front windows, which were taped together with duct tape, and it was nestled between a mechanic’s garage and a Walgreens. She basically had to beg me to go in.
Inside I tried on a few dresses. No luck. Then suddenly my mom was handing me a dress and saying “I know you will probably hate this, but humor me, because i think it is SO YOU.”
I laughed out loud. It was the same dress as the one I had torn out of the magazine. She refused to admit that it was at first, but insisted it was the best dress for me. (Later she would sheepishly admit that it was) I agreed. I was torn between the one that was “me” and one that was completely 1500s ball-gown with embroidered jewels and flowers. My mom and the shop keeper said, in eerie unison, “You look much thinner in the simple one!” Sold! We bought it and walked out after an hour in the store, and before I had even been 24 hours in the country again. Easy-peasy.

Jon and I spent this past Saturday looking for his suit. The consistent theme to our whole marriage-planning adventure is “Firsts.” The first place we visit, we love, we book. The first font we try, we adore, we use. The first day I try dresses, I love, I buy. The first suit shop we pass has a gray suit in the window – the color we’re seeking. We enter, he tries it on, we love it. Of course, just like with the reception hall I am the one to say “If we love it, let’s get it, and free up the rest of our Saturday!!” and Jon is the one to say “But let’s just go visit the other seven places on our list to be sure.” So we did. All seven. Then we made a bee-line for the first store to book the suit; It is the clear winner.

The only problem with the suit arose when Jon went to have it fitted while I was not there. He called me on the cell, frantic. “I cannot wear my brown shoes (his best shoes which he wears once a decade, and are handmade from Italy and cost more than my dress). I can’t wear them! The woman says they break the Three Color Rule!!

“The what? ” I ask.

“The Three Color Rule Jessica! She is so right, why didn’t I think about this!?” he groans, more to himself.

I ask him to explain: The three color rule means no more than three colors with a suit. The suit is gray, the shirt is pink, the tie is fuschia. So he cannot wear brown shoes. Or so she says.

I ask, “Then how can you wear black shoes?”

“Because black is a shade of gray so it is not an additional color.”

“Well fuschia is a shade of pink,” I counter.


To clear up the matter we’ve set another appointment to go in and try on the various colors of shirt/tie/shoe ensembles with the saleswomens’ help. The funny thing is, this rule, it makes sense. To a point. If it happens to look good with four, well, I say do it (though the Saleswomen would shoot me the evil eye and cluck their tongues under their breath). This whole conversation made me laugh because Jon was so…Swiss. So upset about possibly, nearing, contemplating breaking a “Rule.” While in the meantime, if I know him well at all, he really is more “American” in mentality, and he will listen to their well-intentioned advices about color theory, but if he (and only he) likes what he sees in the mirror, four, five, six colors or not, he will wear it.

What about you folks? Have you been abiding my, or hearing of any dress/attire rules throughout this process??



  1. Suzanne said,

    I absolutely adore your piece about firsts, it’s so real and has happened to me more than once in my lifetime. However, I must admit that the rules about color I’m not too sure about. I thought that with choosing wedding dresses or planning weddings, the mean thing was this – “something borrowed, something old, something blue”.

    I can see how too many colors can clash and create disorder in the design. I can also emphatize with the jet lag, rush to shop in person and the pressure of mothers and mother-in-laws. This is why I have recently advised my girlfriend who’s getting married in July to use the power of the internet and shop online from the comfort of her house.

    We get together on Saturday evening at her house or mine and we search google for wedding dress websites online. We use a few search terms to find the most qualified sites – “cheap wedding dress”, “elegant wedding dress”, “petite wedding dress”. She’s now seriously considering buying her dress from kekopeanstitches because she has fallen in love with an elegant lace wedding dress that they carry.

    I don’t know what rule this would represent in terms of the attire rules but this definitely ties in with our “convenience rule” and it helps us with “girls Saturday evening out”. We’re loving the experience and we get to spend some quality time together.

  2. Jess said,

    That is so cool. Perhaps I should organize some kind of online time, while on the phone too, with my BFF since we are on opposites sides of the ocean. One of the main reasons I started this blog is because I dont really have a girlfriend here to bounce ideas off of. But why not do some online shopping, just over the phone!
    I am going to try to start APPLYING the firsts rule. I think I, or americans in general maybe, are too used to looking for better and not going with gut instincts. choosing the first thing we see could be luck – it is always exactly what we were looking for, but I want to try to learn to make small decisions without beating them to the ground in general too.

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